I want to share information that I believe will inspire you to want better for yourselves in relationships, and be better for yourselves from your relationships to your communities and to the world. At the very least it will cause you to think, which might be better than someone lambasting you constantly without offering any solutions.
Many people make the mistake of seeking love of Self through love of another. Of course, people don't realize they are doing this. It is not a conscious effort; their behavior reflects what is going on deep in their subconcious.
People believe that: "If I can just love others, they will love me. THEN I WILL BE LOVABLE, AND I CAN LOVE ME." Many people will hate themselves because they feel there is not another who loves them. THIS IS TRULY A SICKNESS. The truth is that others do love them, BUT IT WON'T MATTER HOW MANY PEOPLE PROFESS THEIR LOVE FOR THEM IT IS NOT ENOUGH.
Why? For two reasons.
First, they don't believe you. They think you are trying to manipulate them... trying to get something (How could you love them for who they truly are? No. There must be some mistake YOU WANT SOMETHING! Now what do you want?)
They sit around trying to figure out how anyone could actually love them. So they don't believe you, and embark on a campaign to make you PROVE IT. To do this they may ask you to start altering your behavior.
Second, if they finally come to a place where can believe you, they begin at once to worry about how long they can keep your love. So in order to hold on to your love they begin to alter their behavior.
Thus, two people literally lose themselves in a relationship. They get into it hoping to find themselves, and they end up losing themselves instead.
Two people join together in a partnership hoping that the whole will be greater than the sum of the parts, only to find that it's less. They feel less than when they were single. Less capable, less able, and less exciting. Less attractive, less joyful, and less content.
They then become less. Now they have both given up most of who they are in order to BE AND TO STAY-in their relationship. Relationships were never meant to be this way. When you lose sight that each person as a sacred soul is on his or her sacred journey then you cannot see the purpose of a relationship.
Though it may be romantic to say that you were 'nothing' until that special someone came along, that statement is not true. In reality, that belief puts an incredible pressure on the other person to be all sorts of things he or she is not.
Not wanting to 'let you down' your partner will try very hard to be and do these things until they can't anymore. They can no longer complete your fantasy of them. They can no longer fill the roles to which they have been assigned. Resentment builds and anger follows.
Finally to reclaim themselves and the relationship these special others begin to claim their real selves, acting in more accordance with who they really are. It is about this time you claim sadly that your partner has 'suddenly changed!'
Relationships are sacred because they provide life's grandest opportunity -- to create and produce the experience of your highest conceptualization of yourself. Relationships fail when you see them as an opportunity to create and produce your highest conceptualization by using someone else to do it.
Let each person in a relationship worry about what self is being, what self is having, what self is seeking, asking, giving, creating and experiencing. This seems a strange teaching from what you have been taught. Yet I tell you this: Your focus upon another, or rather your obsession with another is what causes relationships to fail.
Therefore your first relationship must be with you. Learn to honor and cherish and most importantly love yourself. For More http://www.askheartbeat.com/
Monday, May 26, 2008
Thursday, May 22, 2008
True Friendship - One in a Million
Over the years you start forming relationships with a lot of people starting with family and then friends. The friendship that you form begin at very young age and at all ages you keep on accumulating friends but as you grow older you also start to lose friends, some simply because of lack of time, some over little issues and some friendships by the nature they are formed are transitory in nature.
But have you ever done an introspection to find out what the meaning of a true friendship and if you have one true friend. So let us define what a true friend is and look at all ages to do that. When you are young you form friendships with those who did the same things that you liked and were supportive of you in you endeavors. At the teen age you formed groups of friends mainly because you wanted to be in the group that counted and was known as "the group" so to speak . Come to the young adult age and you start forming friends who know where the limit is and when to stop intruding in your boundary . A little into more mature age like the thirty's and forty's you will form relationship with mature thinking and even have same desires as you have .
In any of the above relationships have you ever thought which of those will stand the test of time and which will not and how many of those friends over the years you could call upon in the hour of need and help. among those will be friends who will not be afraid to call a spade a spade . You will value their opinions and thoughts , you will almost undoubtedly count on their support in the crisis hour , you will yell at them and they will simply stand and smile at you unperturbed. They will do you no harm and will protect you from the unknown in the hour of need.
These are the friends which will expect nothing in return and for them the friendship will mean a lot and will go to any lengths to protect the identity of the friendship. Huh ! these many qualities in one person would be tough to find but the point is that the person whom you count as a true friend will always have them without even trying to be so, it comes naturally to them and they are not swayed by the environmental and social considerations.
These true friendships will stand the test of time and you will know it , recognize it and then feel fortunate enough to have a single true friend in your life. For More visit http://bestfriendgiftideasguide.com/
But have you ever done an introspection to find out what the meaning of a true friendship and if you have one true friend. So let us define what a true friend is and look at all ages to do that. When you are young you form friendships with those who did the same things that you liked and were supportive of you in you endeavors. At the teen age you formed groups of friends mainly because you wanted to be in the group that counted and was known as "the group" so to speak . Come to the young adult age and you start forming friends who know where the limit is and when to stop intruding in your boundary . A little into more mature age like the thirty's and forty's you will form relationship with mature thinking and even have same desires as you have .
In any of the above relationships have you ever thought which of those will stand the test of time and which will not and how many of those friends over the years you could call upon in the hour of need and help. among those will be friends who will not be afraid to call a spade a spade . You will value their opinions and thoughts , you will almost undoubtedly count on their support in the crisis hour , you will yell at them and they will simply stand and smile at you unperturbed. They will do you no harm and will protect you from the unknown in the hour of need.
These are the friends which will expect nothing in return and for them the friendship will mean a lot and will go to any lengths to protect the identity of the friendship. Huh ! these many qualities in one person would be tough to find but the point is that the person whom you count as a true friend will always have them without even trying to be so, it comes naturally to them and they are not swayed by the environmental and social considerations.
These true friendships will stand the test of time and you will know it , recognize it and then feel fortunate enough to have a single true friend in your life. For More visit http://bestfriendgiftideasguide.com/
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Senior Dating - What You Should Know Now
If you believe that it is difficult to meet someone in your 20s, try doing it as an elder. All of the regular ways of meeting someone single like checking out people at concerts or clubs, going to bars, enjoying recreational groups to go hiking in the woods - are off-limits to seniors. Either these activities are too noisy, too fast, or too demanding. And most essentially, other elders aren't going to these types of events! The Web offers many potential keys to the problems of senior dating, but senior citizens have been slow to learn advanced electronic communication. However, they are finally getting there. Senior citizen dating is taking off the way the Web singles dating scene did a decade ago. Internet dating is ideal for many elderly people. We have to keep in mind that senior citizens mobility is often limited. Even when they are not limited, they are less likely to want to go out and cruise. For single seniors, the world can be a pretty bleak and depressing place. There is nothing quite like having someone you love next to you to make your twilight years more peaceful. That is the reason why senior dating is getting more and more popular. Although it hasn't caught on yet, I am pretty sure it will only be a matter of months before it is the next craze among the over 60. For a few months, I have been running a senior dating site myself, and I have definitely seen an increase in concern. As Senior Web skills increase, more seniors want to put themselves out there over the Web. Traditionally, older people do not trust new technologies, but these days there are senior chat room dating Web sites created all over the place. Word-of-mouth spreads pretty quickly among the elderly, and it will only be a matter of time before senior dating comes into its own. Of course, for dating seniors, things are a little bit more complicated. As the CEO of a senior dating site, I try to accommodate their special requests. Senior dates often are limited by the lack of mobility that one or both partners have. This is particularly true in communities without sufficient public transportation. In my opinion, chauffeured Senior dates will be the next stage in senior dating. Instead of being inconvenient, dating will be romantic and luxurious. I could definitely see seniors getting behind it! This well known writer is an Internet buff and truly likes sharing his information with others. For More visit http://www.datingpersonalsonlinesites.com/senior-dating-seniordating.html
Friday, May 9, 2008
First Dating Tips
So you've met a girl. She's cute, she's flirty and she's agreed to go on a date with you. That's great news - but where are you going to go?
At this point, all you're thinking about is spending an evening in her company. Perhaps you're hoping to spend the night. You certainly haven't thought beyond the first few dates.
But she has.
Almost without exception, when a girl meets a guy she likes she starts imagining a rosy future with him. It's not that she necessarily believes you're The One, but she's mulling over the possibility. There's nothing you can do to prevent it - but you can avoid encouraging her.
Below are the five dates guaranteed to get a girl fantasizing about cakes and white dresses. If you want to keep things casual for now, steer well clear.
1. Romantic Comedies
The movie theater is a popular first date destination. The film negates the need for conversation, the darkened room creates a feeling of intimacy, and the plot gives you something easy to talk about afterwards. But do choose your movie carefully.
Romantic comedies might seem like harmless fluff but avoid them at all costs. Far too many rom-coms involve grand romantic gestures, huge white weddings and tedious plots. Going to see one means risking giving your date unrealistic expectations and putting the pressure on you.
2. Her Place
Women are forever being told that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach; this is why so many of them are keen to cook for you. But going to a girl's apartment means giving her control.
Cooking you a meal will make your date feel feminine, nurturing and intimate. She can fill the room with candles, play schmaltzy music and wait for you to praise her homemaking abilities. In short, she can act like your girlfriend.
3. Weddings
There's nothing like watching a happy couple celebrate their love for one another to put ideas in a woman's head. Accompany her to a wedding and you can guarantee that your hand will be squeezed throughout the vows, meaningful looks shot your way during the speeches, and excited giggles aimed in your direction whenever an elderly relative speculates about whether your date will be next down the aisle.
4. Taking a Walk
If you barely know your date, avoid taking a romantic stroll together. Going for a walk in the country means the two of you spending time alone together without any convenient distractions. Either you are going to bore each other into going home alone, or the chance to talk to you without interruptions will convince her that you share a special connection. Prepare to be described as "Mr. Right".
5. Meeting her Friends
Meeting her friends, family or even just her colleagues will instantly elevate you from casual date to partner. Once you've met the important people in her life you will be an official couple.
What's more, the future of your fledging relationship will no longer depend on whether your date likes you; it will depend on whether everybody else does, too. If you fail to impress them, you can forget seeing her again - but, worse still, if her friends really like you, they're going to start telling your date to expect a surprise proposal. For more visit http://www.chickmagnet101.com/meet-women317.html
At this point, all you're thinking about is spending an evening in her company. Perhaps you're hoping to spend the night. You certainly haven't thought beyond the first few dates.
But she has.
Almost without exception, when a girl meets a guy she likes she starts imagining a rosy future with him. It's not that she necessarily believes you're The One, but she's mulling over the possibility. There's nothing you can do to prevent it - but you can avoid encouraging her.
Below are the five dates guaranteed to get a girl fantasizing about cakes and white dresses. If you want to keep things casual for now, steer well clear.
1. Romantic Comedies
The movie theater is a popular first date destination. The film negates the need for conversation, the darkened room creates a feeling of intimacy, and the plot gives you something easy to talk about afterwards. But do choose your movie carefully.
Romantic comedies might seem like harmless fluff but avoid them at all costs. Far too many rom-coms involve grand romantic gestures, huge white weddings and tedious plots. Going to see one means risking giving your date unrealistic expectations and putting the pressure on you.
2. Her Place
Women are forever being told that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach; this is why so many of them are keen to cook for you. But going to a girl's apartment means giving her control.
Cooking you a meal will make your date feel feminine, nurturing and intimate. She can fill the room with candles, play schmaltzy music and wait for you to praise her homemaking abilities. In short, she can act like your girlfriend.
3. Weddings
There's nothing like watching a happy couple celebrate their love for one another to put ideas in a woman's head. Accompany her to a wedding and you can guarantee that your hand will be squeezed throughout the vows, meaningful looks shot your way during the speeches, and excited giggles aimed in your direction whenever an elderly relative speculates about whether your date will be next down the aisle.
4. Taking a Walk
If you barely know your date, avoid taking a romantic stroll together. Going for a walk in the country means the two of you spending time alone together without any convenient distractions. Either you are going to bore each other into going home alone, or the chance to talk to you without interruptions will convince her that you share a special connection. Prepare to be described as "Mr. Right".
5. Meeting her Friends
Meeting her friends, family or even just her colleagues will instantly elevate you from casual date to partner. Once you've met the important people in her life you will be an official couple.
What's more, the future of your fledging relationship will no longer depend on whether your date likes you; it will depend on whether everybody else does, too. If you fail to impress them, you can forget seeing her again - but, worse still, if her friends really like you, they're going to start telling your date to expect a surprise proposal. For more visit http://www.chickmagnet101.com/meet-women317.html
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